

English / 09.09.2019 / 9514
When he was younger, he wouldn’t have even looked at a girl with even a hint of cellulitis. Nowadays, he had visions of a big rough female butt in the mornings
Vaeroy was an island of single men. The issue with sex was prevailing. In the beginning, when Brasileiro was at a bar and spotted a girl, he instantly began shooting his shot (**).
His kind neighbors stopped him. Using broken English, they explained that the girl was the only daughter of the island’s only policeman. It could have ended badly — the aborigines didn’t approve of their local women fooling around with foreign gentlemen.
Today’s beauty was a newcomer. That was good — perhaps, there was a chance at something happening… An older comrade once told Brasileiro:
— You chose the life of a sailor... What women do you expect? You know what they say about Arkhangelsk? Anguish, plank and codfish. That’s what’s waiting for you. Women aren’t waiting for you. Don’t even bother.
Brasileiro didn’t hope for anything. Five years ago, he left his hometown. He thought that he was looking to find adventures. Turns out — he was looking to find himself. And now, this Odyssey had brought him onto an island which no one needs, an island, which has the sole purpose of hiding fugitives, who would then prepare codfish…
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Oh! Were you expecting something? That’s odd. So many people gathered, and nothing’s happening. No-thing. Absolutely nothing. Can you imagine it? You might have thought we’d have a new text for you here, maybe even a story. One with elements of philosophical and theological discussion, one filled with real stories and adapted for practical use. So many expectations, and here I am, unprepared. I didn’t write a single word. It’s embarrassing, really. Well, don’t you worry. We’ll find something to “snack on”. I can’t promise a real feast of the mind, but there will be some food for thought. Like a diligent housewife who wasn’t expecting guests, I’ll have to come up with something on the spot. That’s not a problem. I just have to find the first Word. The second one will find itself. And before you know it, we’ll have enough for some salad and a couple sandwiches. It’s no Christmas dinner, sure, but if you pull out that bottle you have stashed away…
Read more...How do you find your purpose? This question torments the poor and the rich alike. And if someone thinks that once they earn millions and billions, they will no longer have to worry about it... I will run as fast as I can, fall, rub my knees (ouch!), and still keep running, just to make sure I'm there on time to disappoint the reader. The question of purpose weighs on anyone-regardless of the bank statement. And if the reader is curious, I'm going to tell a story about a very wealthy man.
Read more...For many years, we on the Dark Side have been repeating the same advice to our female readers: if you want to woo a man, just give him the scarcest commodity of the modern world – a compliment. The ladies nod in response. They tense their facial muscles and hiss something approving through their teeth, but they can never keep it up. Invariably they end up flinging mud and criticism at their beloved, and with passion at that. And then these fair ladies stroll through their respective cities and see a striking picture...
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