English / 09.09.2019 / 3505
When he was younger, he wouldn’t have even looked at a girl with even a hint of cellulitis. Nowadays, he had visions of a big rough female butt in the mornings 
Vaeroy was an island of single men. The issue with sex was prevailing. In the beginning, when Brasileiro was at a bar and spotted a girl, he instantly began shooting his shot (**).
His kind neighbors stopped him. Using broken English, they explained that the girl was the only daughter of the island’s only policeman. It could have ended badly — the aborigines didn’t approve of their local women fooling around with foreign gentlemen.
Today’s beauty was a newcomer. That was good — perhaps, there was a chance at something happening… An older comrade once told Brasileiro:
— You chose the life of a sailor... What women do you expect? You know what they say about Arkhangelsk? Anguish, plank and codfish. That’s what’s waiting for you. Women aren’t waiting for you. Don’t even bother.
Brasileiro didn’t hope for anything. Five years ago, he left his hometown. He thought that he was looking to find adventures. Turns out — he was looking to find himself. And now, this Odyssey had brought him onto an island which no one needs, an island, which has the sole purpose of hiding fugitives, who would then prepare codfish…
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His fingers were freezing from the cold. Gauntlets over the gloves, winter boots… None of this protected him from the harsh wind. The arctic ocean is nearby. Is that where the wind is blowing from?
— Brasileiro, why did you get distracted? Hook it up... — commanded the crew chief. He was making sure that the workers were quick at hanging the fish to dry.
Brasileiro looked at the cod with hatred. Cod, cod, cod... Those who never lived in northern Europe would not understand the significance of this fish. It would be shocking to find out that in the second half of the 20th century, there were three times when Iceland was ready to start a war with England over codfish.
...And the complaints started coming in from all over the Internet. We heard a quacking from the Facebook swamp:
— And my mum used to tell me: haven't you eaten too much? My mum's toxic!
"Toxes will never admit their mistakes!" the second frog answered her...
How do you find your purpose? This question torments the poor and the rich alike. And if someone thinks that once they earn millions and billions, they will no longer have to worry about it... I will run as fast as I can, fall, rub my knees (ouch!), and still keep running, just to make sure I'm there on time to disappoint the reader. The question of purpose weighs on anyone-regardless of the bank statement. And if the reader is curious, I'm going to tell a story about a very wealthy man.
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My father played a mean joke on me. Our discussions, though rare, always left me in a state of slight to heavy confusion. For example, when I was five years old, he told me: “A man could never imagine two things: infinity and eternity”. My mind, young and inquisitive as it was, decided to test that statement. I sat down in my room and tried to imagine the supposedly unimaginable entities. This led to intense drooling.
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